Monday, January 20, 2014

from something to nothing

life is always fun when you are going through a divorce.  I hate having to explain it to people and have them apologize.  I want to ask them if they are what made my husband a lazy, impotent, jerk?

The nursing home called my father today and my mother was doing bad, wanted him to come and try to calm her down.  "She is fighting death who has come for her...." was his outlook, which is probably right.  He told me not to come because he had seen this before and it was better this way.  I said my goodbyes years ago. 

My soon to be ex showed up today to get his mail and the divorce papers.  I had put all of the medication in the bag for Buckley that he will need.  He didn't want to take it now.  It just put it up in the cabinet and said whatever.  I was shocked that he used the front door and rang the doorbell, since he was so adamant about keeping both of the garage door openers.  He got his stuff and on his way out asked how my mother was doing, I told him "dying".  He asked if there was anything that they could do.  I said no.  He asked if there was anything they could do to keep her comfortable, I said they were giving her morphine.  He then got home and sent me a text about why I couldn't be nice to him when he was being so nice to me.  I didn't respond.  He then called me and I thanked him for being nice to me during this divorce but that I was cautious that he and his family would turn on me and come at me with everything that they had.  He said that he would never do that.  I told him that I knew him well enough to know that when he gets angry he will do and say whatever it takes to win.  He disagreed.  It blows me away that we have very different viewpoints on our marriage.  He told me that he never wanted to make me miserable, he just wanted to make my life perfect.......we obviously have different definitions of what perfect is. 

His parents are so concerned about me going to church.  I told him that I would find a new church to go to, because all I need is to see my ex twice a week.  If they are so concerned about me and my future I would have had to not go to school this semester.  Oh well, I knew it was coming.  The lines were drawn and it is amazing how one day you are part of something and the next you are nothing. 

1 comment:

  1. That's the saga of divorce. The only people I ever knew that didn't draw a line in the sand were my mom and dad. They told Butch he was the one who divorced his wife not them and that Dottie would always be part of their family and she always was. I don't think Butch liked it much but he got over it.