headache

the summer between my freshman and sophomore year in high school

Mother decided that i needed to have something to keep me preoccupied, so i became a candystriper (hope i spelled that right, an extra/omitted p and that sentence has a new meaning).  I really did like it, but i didn't like the whole patient thing, so i spent most of my time in medical records shredding documents.....i loved the sense of accomplishment. 

It was a good and bad summer for my mother and I.  I don't really remember the good times (shocking i know), but i do remember her inability to be patient with me.  It was my job to vacuum the house every day or maybe every other day.  I know that most normal people only vacuum once a week, but my mother is a clean freak.  I am a teenager, vacuuming the house is not important to me, making my mother not be angry is though.  I vacuum the house and i don't notice (because there is no dirt on the floor) that the vacuum is not picking up and my mother is mad at me because i don't notice.  I think i knew at that time or i didn't really care that there was never going to be a way to make my mother happy.  Her standards are impossible to keep.  My father now vacuums the house daily, even though i am sure it isn't right, he does it because she cant and this is the standard that she always had. 

Pleasing my mother is like banging your bloody head against the wall, i am tired of my head hurting.