Friday, February 10, 2012

love what god gave you

Marilyn Monroe was 5'5" and weighed at her heaviest 140 in the movie "lets make love" (which i just finished watching and she looked far from fat).  If alive today she would have worn a size 8 to 12.   This is the woman that is synonymous with sex and beauty. 

I wear a size 12 and have fought my weight my entire life.  I went to the doctor a month ago and got on the scale....171!!!!!  Needless to say my donut/frozen yogurt diet ceased immediately.  I am about 5'6" and cant tell you the last time i was below 150 (i think i was married to my first husband over a decade ago). 

I still struggle with body dis morphia, but have learned to be less codependent on what size jeans i fit into and more focused on wearing clothes that make me feel good (no matter what size i happen to be that day).  I can remember sitting on the floor and crying because i thought i was so fat in high school (eye roll).  I wished i would have learned to love my body instead of spending all of those years hating it.  Waiting to start my life until i was able to be a size 8 again.  Spending days depressed and not going anywhere because i couldn't fit into my jeans. 

I decided to stop hating my body and start loving what god gave me.

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