well, I finally bit the bullet today and told my department manager that she wouldn't become my new assistant. She then told me she would be looking for a new job and then left early.
This is what I do. I come home and feel guilty because I have made someone upset and now they are angry with me. When in reality they are the ones that made the decisions to do stupid things (going out with employees, making out with one, relinquishing an animal so that the company would pay for the surgery on the animal, taking items that were to be destroyed) and I have pointed out every year that I have issue with this kind of integrity. I told this person that I just cannot put myself in a position where I cannot trust their judgment, I have burned by that and I am not about to let myself be put in that position again.
Honestly with all of this being said, it is probably better that she leaves. I just hope that it is quick and painless. I hope that I am not graded on turnover this year.....because I am going to just fail.
Today was a good day, even with the drama.
I think that yesterday put things into perspective. I have a good quality of life. I don't have to depend on someone to get me from point a to point b, physically. The flip side of that coin is that I don't have a ton of sympathy for people when they are complaining about things. There was a young man who stood up last night at church and said that his mother died when he was six. That is horrible. He spoke of being addicted to online porn and drugs. He was probably barely in his twenties, not old enough to have that much baggage. My heart went out to him. At least I am 41, I had 35 more years than he had.