well....between spending the weekend sick and printer issues (which I fixed, thank you very much). I didn't do much for my birthday weekend. I was suppose to go and have dinner with my in laws on Monday, but it was like I could only do one task at a time and then had to take a rest. I did make it to class last night and realized that I might actually be an accountant.
I really don't think I realized how much the toxic people in my life have just sucked the life out of me for the last year. I hate to say it, those people have made me different to my employees. If all you want to do is cause strife in my life, then please don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you. I had that conversation with an employee yesterday. She started crying and telling me how she had PTSD and wasn't medicated and had all a lot of personal issues. I just wanted to say "Lady, I have been diagnosed with it all". I did tell her that I have spent the last year with a debilitating depression which I am either at work, in class, or in bed. I don't feel as though any of them care about me or my issue. I try my hardest to ensure that they get the schedule they want and I don't feel as though I get any consideration. I know, I just transferred my feelings from other issues to my employees, but I don't really feel like bending over for people anymore. How does that saying go? Don't cross an ocean for someone who wouldn't walk across a puddle for you. That is exactly how I feel about people these days. Dustin tells me I am a ray of sunshine. I feel that it is just reality. My therapist keeps telling me that I need to look at my childhood and accept it for what it was, not what I deserved or what it should have been. Maybe this is just how I have adjusted my entire life outlook.
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